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Bad Years

by Henry Mink

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1.
2.
Noroi 04:40
I'm on a diet eating cigarettes and animal bones Reading other peoples' mail much more than I look at my own Shapes and shadows and the sounds of machines I'm always running but they're walking faster than I can see I'm on a bench inside a park inside a subduction zone I swore once but gotta swear it again That I'm not gonna miss you 'til the sun comes up again Stained glass windows but there's mud seeping into my home I'm on a diet eating cigarettes and animal bones Sitting at a counter pouring coffee and neglecting my phone Walked you down to the cave in the rain Watched the garden, climbed the wall, and untangled a chain Nesting on a branch older than what I've ever known I swore once but gotta swear it again That I'm not gonna miss you 'til the sun comes up again Boarded windows but there's mud seeping into my home
3.
What to do with sweet memories that ended sour— Frame them, caress them, or lock them in a tower? Drop them off of a pier with weighted feet? Gasp each time they crawl out from the deep? Tranquilize them or let them have their say? Listen deeply or run so far away? Barricade them in your darkest room? Change cities, they'll be homeward bound so soon And it feels so physical Can't tuck them away, put them away at all Running up the stairs and through the wall What to do with good memories that ended bad— Look back fondly or stuff them into a bag? Lock them in a locker at the station where You last kissed her and she last touched your hair? What to do with fond memories that are still raw– Make a soup of them 'til it boils over Don't think about them for most of all the days Let them hum, you can hum louder anyways And it feels insatiable Somewhere someone's living my life right But I don't know who they are or where they are tonight And it's irretrievable Orpheus is the myth I understand the best Not the singing part, but all the rest
4.
In Eggshells 04:40
The last time he got fired, he spent nearly 6 months away Didn't sleep much at night but he slept almost every day One afternoon in his sleep, he saw an invisible tray Filled with fish eyes and cacti spilling off of empty plates In eggshells When he was back on his feet, he went for a walk in his shroud Needed to let it air out or it would look unseasonably loud Walked to his old job and planted himself outside Whistling "when I can tie my shoelaces, maybe I'll learn how to drive" In eggshells Now he lives by the ocean in a house that shakes in the wind When it's cold, he pours hot water on his bed and tucks in Last night in his sleep, he saw an unreachable tray Slowly pushed on a gurney somewhere far too far away In eggshells
5.
Row Row Row 02:54
Caught in the land of Heaven Rubbing on the gallows Sentenced to intercession Rowing through the town below Sometimes you just find venom Coursing even through the aloe In Venice or in Texas, Rowrowrowrowrrowrowrow Beneath the ship of Heaven Someone spreads the tallow In the middle of the shimmering voices, Someone is the antelope Riding the crest of glory Sit down, you're fucking the boat A prayer of intercession: Rowrowrowrowrrowrowrow
6.
Beamish Boy 03:01
Looking for a sidewalk on a street with no sidewalks All the curbs are covered in the snow The poles are blinking such significant lights And the trees are ill with crows Oh no Back home, you break a dirty plate by mistake But who can really tell or really know Planes flying over, groaning into the night And the trees are ripe with crows Oh no I'll wear the sound Of the circus bound Pacing in the cage by the show Oh no The scans have found My fingers just touch the ground I've been tamed by the crows Oh no
7.
8.
"And I run to death, it meets me as fast all my pleasures are like yesterday, yeah!" Has there come a sound Collect in my mouth Running out the door now Living on its own, too late to let it out I wasn't born yet But I knew something was going down Thought I was ready for the calm, for the calm For the cupping and collecting now When I wanted to Didn't always know Courage for this world Left hand side of love Has there come a sound Collect in my mouth Running out the door now Living on its own, too late to let it out I hadn't died yet But I knew that I was going down I wasn't ready for the slugs, for the slugs For the cupping and collecting now When I wanted to Didn't always know Courage for this world Left hand side of love When I wanted to Didn't always know Courage for this world Left hand side of love
9.
I feel so glum and I've been 6 feet overdone I'm either on a bus or catching a train With ax and jug wine I've been searching for a goldmine Inside 40,000 miles of rain Sometimes when lonely I can think I find it homely But it feels much more like legerdemain Map soaked and faded Laying right where I mislaid it Inside 40,000 miles of rain rain rain rain A saxophone Is only covering the rusty bones Right where I hang my claim I run the numbers I think just another summer Baby, you know I'm a doggone swain I put a hand up The other hand's so clammed up Crumpling a paper plane plane plane plane plane And when I die My last words better be a lie Just going clang clang into the rain I feel so glum and I said buckle up its coming And there's gonna be a hell of a stain Just need a spit-shine When you're searching for a goldmine And the only thing you found is a sprain Past time to tone it Maybe wrestling my old hits Never paid in anything by shame shame shame shame shame And on the Rhine I saw the look inside her eyes It looked like 40,000 miles of rain
10.
Slide 03:40
Heard of a voice that croaks and mutters Knew of a mouth that's cracked and dry When I get lodged, cough up the rest of me How in the world else will I get by? So tell the phone to keep ringing Sloughing out of decline Bound in all the coldest metal Never warm but fortified Heard of a man who couldn't chop well Never knew which axe to grind Know a lot of stories, most don't end well Never a playground without a slide
11.
12.
Afterwards 03:50
Close enough's enough Listen, calm it down Afterwards, let it go Close enough's enough Let it roam and cull Oh, close enough's enough Let it go In this mess a lesser note Climbs for the tongue And the sentimental form and tone A willow knows When the stone intones "heavy road" And the mess of arms is gone... Call the story done Stunned and alone When you're messing with a comet's tail Running's no good When you're shedding and the sun has gone Running all around the globe And the decades of parole have gone And the decades of parole have gone
13.
Although we both have justified regrets I've never felt so known And if and when we ever meet again Could we be alone? Missed many chances over many years Wearing careful clothes In nice apartments that we never rent Never rent for long So strange to not know how you are Are unsent letters piling up In your office desk? Am I one migraine less? When it's difficult When the lights are down low I only hope your head is so warm

credits

released December 7, 2020

Written, produced, and sung by Joel Minkin.

'Afterwards' music by Stefan Perkins.

Mastered by Ethan Pierce. A Dream Friends Records release.

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Henry Mink Portland, Oregon

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